The Past

"This isn't a good idea,
you know this isn't fair. I shouldn't" Well I shouldn't have. I was dumb and stupid is that what you want to hear? That I'm weak when it comes to you. Are you satisfied yet? Is that enough? That I can't be tough when it comes to your touch- Because you're conceited you leave me defeated- unable to speak- on my knees not my feet- And all I leave with
is regret And the taste of you as on my mouth it lingers- And the feel of your manhood throught out all my fingers- The feel of your lips all over my breast- And I know that it's wrong but I want your caress. And as you touch me I slowly undress- Your hands on my thighs I realize...
"This isn't a good idea, you know this isnt fair" I shouldnt well i shouldnt have and next time, I wont

single and ok with it

As much as i loved the feeling of bein in love, i had 4gotten the feelin of bein free. Not havin to please a man or worry about what he's doing or where he's at and why he hasnt called me in a few. I realize i dnt need a man to make me feel beautiful and sexy. Im those things on my own. It just feels so good to be me and not we. I lost myself in my relationship but now im found. Its good to be back

day by day

In response to my confused blog. For the 1st time im puttin it out there and stating how i feel. Me and my daughter father were goin through somethings. we are suppose to be friends and wen i was goin through an issue he wasnt there 4 me. He didnt even call me and ask me if i was ok. So i emailed him and told him dat since he doesnt kno wat to say or never calls me not to worry about bein there 4 me ever again, i said that i would just handle and go through things on my own like usual. He got upset. I called him days later and said i quit and dnt wanna work things out wit him. He said it was ok, we got into an arguement and he hung up on me, i called him eight times and he didnt pick up, the next day i changed my number and i dnt want to hear from him. i told him dat wen he if he wants to c his daughter to email me, my friends said it was wrong but no one understands wat i go through and put up wit him. Im a single mother trying to raise my daughter with love and make it day by day, i dnt have time for drama

so confused

Im so confused i dnt kno wat to do or feel

things left unsaid

The other day , i was speakin to my daughters father about something that we're goin through. He asked me how i felt and what i was thinkin and i knew the answer, i just didnt have the courage to tell him wat i really felt. i wanted to just say wat was on my heart but i was afraid id hurt him. if u love someone arent u suppose to be honest wit them and not hold ur emotions bac. or do u censor wat u say and hide ur emotions because u love them. and at the end of the day there are so many things left unsaid

what is with guys and phones

Its official, i dnt understand why most(85%) guys dnt like to speak on the phone. or is it just the ones i kno. its like, in person guys r ok, but ova the phone they're just stuck. either that or they just dnt want to talk. oh and another thing please stop sayin ur gonna call bac and u kno ur not its only gonna make me mad . when u call please have atleast 2 topics we can speak about in mind and wen i call please stop givin me 1 word answers. And i dnt have unlimited text so i cnt text all day whats so hard about talkin on the phone? i dnt get it till next time Sweet Amazon

cheaters!!!

I fail to understand why spouses cheat on eachother. Today i fouod out that some close to me has been cheated on by their spous. CAN SOMEONE HELP ME UNDERSTAND CHEATIN. If you tell someone you love them why blatanly hurt them. Im my opinion cheatin is for cowards, who want to have their cake and eat it to. Cheater dnt understand that peopld get killed for cheatin(ever heard of a crime of passion). when u cheat you are disrespecting everyone involved. I'd rather someone break up wit me instead of cheatin on me. Because cheatin is a cowardly act. SICK OF CHEATERS

waiting for marriage

Me and my boyfriend have decided to wait till we get married to have sex. Although we already have a child. sometimes i wonder if it makes sense, i mean we want to do things right u kno. yea we had sex b4 but theres just somethin special about him waitin 4 me. Atleast we already tested the merchandise b4 buying it. so yea it does make sense i guess

Nightmare

Last night I had a nightmare. In my nightmare I was emailing someone with one hand and holding Tatiana with the other, in the blink of an eye she jumped out my hand and landed and onto the floor, I picked her up and looked at her to make sure she was okay, when I looked at her head she was bleeding. I took her to the hospital and the doctor asked me how did that happen and I lied and said she had bumped her head on the wall, then the doctor said" Lets see how serious this is" and then after examining her he said" mom this is real bad, this is real bad" and the doctors closed the curtins and pished me away further and further away from her, Once they had er bandaged up she was laying in the bed, and I kept trying to make her laugh was she just laying there looking lifeless. Then I woke up because her father called my phone, That was a horrible nightmare when i got off the phone with tatiana's father I felt like I was gonna cry, I couldnt imagine anything lke that really happening, Thank God it was just a nightmare

Being a mom

Bein a mom, really is a 24/7 job. It takes so much, patience and love and care. Lately I've been thinking about when I'm going to start working again, but its kinda hard because I don't really trust people to watch my daughter. Not only that but, I'm not use to being away from tatiana, so its like I really need to start working but I just to need to figure things out. Bein a mom, also means that you become warrior any one who holds tatiana wrong or lets her cry in instantly told t hand her over, Smetimes I feel like Im to attached to her but I cant help it, after all I did carry her in my womb for 9 months

tatiana

Love at first sight. Unconditional love. The day I had my daughter was truelly the best day of my life. There is no feeling like the feeling that I get when she smiles at me and when she laughs with me. Anyone who attempts to ever hurt her. is putting their life at risk. I never loved anyone the way I love Tatiana. She's six months today. She's so funny and beautiful and everything I coudve have wanted. I love her so much